And the days you defend will turn to gold: THIS IS HOW I LIED.

This Is How I Lied by Heather Gudenkauf

My rating: 4.5 of 5 stars


Eve Knox was only sixteen when she died in the caves by her house. She was murdered, her body found by her best friend Maggie and Eve's younger sister, Nola. While there were some suspects--her boyfriend, Nick; the local town drifter--no one was ever arrested and the case, led by Maggie's police chief father, went cold. Now Maggie herself is a detective in her hometown of Grotto, Iowa. She becomes lead on Eve's case when it is reopened after new evidence emerges. Immediately Maggie is transported back to her childhood and her friendship with Eve. But as Maggie digs deeper into the case, she realizes there were a lot of secrets buried with Eve, many of which no one in Grotto want discovered. Maybe not even Maggie herself.


"Over the years, I lost my mom, my innocence and my best friend. This street has been a graveyard to me."


This book was one of those delicious surprises that turns out to be so much better than you expect. I've never read a book by Heather Gudenkauf before, but I certainly will be reading more of her books now! I read this as I was sent a Netgalley widget, and I'm so glad! This is such a dark and twisty tale, and I loved how it kept me guessing the entire time, always wondering and doubting myself about what exactly happened to Eve.

Gudenkauf tells her tale from multiple perspectives and time periods, but unlike so many thrillers these days, she does so deftly. It's heartbreaking to hear from the Eve of twenty-five years ago, knowing her fate, yet fascinating, as she slowly dispenses details and clues about what has happened to her. Eve's younger sister is the "town crazy," a veterinarian with a penchant for extreme creepiness. We also have Maggie's even-keeled husband, Shaun, who runs their orchard (and did I mention Maggie is way pregnant?), her father, the ex-chief, who is suffering from dementia, and her brother, who has been forced to care for him. And lets not forget Eve's ex-boyfriend, Nick, who now runs a store in town.

The small-town dynamics are perfect here. Eve's murder is the biggest thing to happen to this town. Everyone knows everyone else, and they think they all know each other's secrets. But, goodness, the secrets and lies buried deep in this small town are just beginning as Maggie starts investigating Eve's death again. The story unfolds perfectly--new pieces coming at you in just the right amount, constantly changing the perspective and allowing suspects to switch around in your mind. Half the thrillers I read, I feel like I have the "whodunnit" figured out from the beginning, but I was never sure here, always frantically reading, always wondering, and being pulled deeply into Eve and Maggie's lives.

Overall, I really enjoyed this one. I loved the surprise of it--finding a book I didn't expect to be so good--and I loved being drawn into such a taunt well-written thriller. 4.5 stars.

I received a copy of this book from Harlequin/Park Row and Netgalley in return for an unbiased review. It is available as of 5/12/2020.


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