We built a wall around ourselves: INSOMNIA.

Insomnia by Sarah Pinborough
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

Emma Averell has worked hard to leave her childhood in the past. But as she nears 40, she cannot help but remember her own mother. When she turned 40, there was a terrible incident, and Emma and her older sister went into foster care. Emma has longed for stability ever since, and she's found it with her husband and two children. But now, she worries she's slowly going mad, just like her mother did at the same age. As she finds herself increasingly unable to sleep, wandering her home at night and losing time in the day, she fears her mother was right--madness is in her blood.

This book totally stressed me out with Emma's inability to sleep! It's very immersive, and you completely feel Emma's descent into sleeplessness and madness. INSOMNIA is a captivating and fast read. It certainly has its repetitive moments--there's a lot of scenes with Emma wandering her home, awake and pondering her life choices. At times, it's a bit much and it's painful to read about her "madness." But there's also an intriguing story, as Emma thinks back to her childhood, her mother, and what truly happened when she was young. I figured out a part of the plot fairly early on, but it didn't diminish my interest. As with most Pinborough books, there's a weird twist thrown in at the end--I wasn't sure this one was necessary and it sort of ruined some of the story for me. But overall, this is a quick and intriguing thriller. 3.5+ stars.

I received a copy of this book from William Morrow and Custom House, Scene of the Crime, and Netgalley in return for an unbiased review.

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B, A to Z Challenge: BEHIND HER EYES.

Behind Her Eyes by Sarah Pinborough
My rating: 3.75 of 5 stars

This is the second book in my #atozchallenge! I'm challenging myself to read a book from my shelves that starts with each letter of the alphabet. Let's clear those shelves and delve into that backlist!

Louise has a pretty boring life. A single mom and part-time secretary, most of her life revolves around her young son. But then one night she meets a man in a bar and feels an instant attraction. Though it stops with a kiss, she feels excited by the prospect of finally having met someone. So imagine Louise's surprise when, the next morning, she sees the man again. At work. He's her new boss. And he's also very married, to a beautiful younger wife, Adele. Soon, Louise accidentally runs into Adele and the two form a friendship. Louise knows it's wrong, but she feels drawn to Adele as well. She appears lonely. Plus, the more Louise learns about Adele, the more she feels something is off: Adele seems afraid and almost controlled by David. Before she knows it, Louise is spending time with Adele and David, unable to tell the other about what she's doing. She's also realizing that there's something very wrong with this marriage. But how wrong, Louise has no idea.

"You can never know everything about a person. You'd go mad trying to."

Well, this was a spellbinding thriller. It's a wild ride that keeps you guessing the entire time, wondering who is twisting whose mind and what on earth is going on between David, Adele, and even Louise. Is David an abusive husband controlling his wife? Is Adele a cowed and crazy housewife? What happened between David and Adele when they were young and Adele's parents died? Is Louise complicit in their games? I felt befuddled and mesmerized as I madly flipped the pages, trying to figure out what on earth was going on.

"The more I fall for David, the more fascinated I become with Adele. It's a vicious circle."

I knew I didn't really like any of these people, but I didn't care, as I had to know what was going to happen next. Trying to put together the pieces in this psychological puzzle is nearly impossible; it seems like everyone is playing mind games with everyone else. It's told in a Now and Then format, with perspectives from Adele and Louise. But who can we trust? Does anyone tell the truth in this book? I won't spoil it for you, but I can say that the short chapters and flip in time periods make for a captivating read.

Some of the plot is strange and again, the characters are not particularly likeable (Louise, come on, let's make better choices), but the book makes up for it in psychological thrills and twists. Behind Her Eyes has been on my shelf for a while, as I'd heard about its surprises and big ending. I'm glad I used this challenge to pick it up. It was a different read and a crazy one. 3.75 stars, rounded to 4 here.

You can read more about the #atozchallenge here.

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You picked me up when I was down: DEAD TO HER.

Dead to Her by Sarah Pinborough

My rating: 2.5 of 5 stars


Marcie Maddox is Jason's second wife. She's younger than most of the elite set she associates with in Savannah, Georgia. That all changes when Jason's boss, William Radford IV brings home his own second wife. Keisha is even younger than Marcie. She's English, irreverent, and strikingly beautiful. Jason's been distracted lately, but he seems to have no problem focusing on Keisha. Suddenly Marcie finds herself feeling second best, and she doesn't like it one bit.

I hate to say it, but this book really just wasn't for me. The writing felt cheesy and stilted, and for most of the book, I just couldn't get into the plot. It had a slow start--we're introduced to Keisha, who has obviously married the much older "Billy" for his money, and we learn that Jason (and Marcie) have secrets of their own. But we don't get to learn any of these secrets, and so the plot is just a drawn out introduction to everyone, with constant teasing to these supposedly explosive secrets. I just felt like yelling, "get on with it already!"

Then things do finally move on, but they take some outrageous turns that felt a bit melodramatic and, at times, completely unbelievable. This is a really strange, weird read. There's voodoo and black magic, a lesbian storyline, and some very odd, often unlikable characters. I really wasn't invested in anyone. And while I am typically really excited for a lesbian plotline, this one felt forced, and the LGBTIA treatment of the characters was often pretty despicable: a gay party-planning couple is treated really derogatory and mocked, as well as portrayed in really stereotypical fashion, while lesbians are called "dykes" and just not really shown any respect at all. Ugh. Maybe I was being over-sensitive, but I wasn't impressed.

The book picks up a bit near the end, and there are a few good twists, but overall, not enough to redeem it for me. Others seem to enjoy this one, so take my review with a grain of salt, but this was a 2.5-star read for me.

I received a copy from Netgalley and William Morrow in return for an unbiased review.

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I'll get revenge the only way I know: CROSS HER HEART.

Cross Her Heart by Sarah Pinborough

My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars


Lisa lives a quiet life with her teenage daughter, Ava. She keeps a close-hold on her, which chafes on Ava, who is ready for independence from her mother. But Lisa has a good reason. She has a secret past: one she's never shared with Ava or even her best friend and co-worker, Marilyn. All that changes when Ava rescues a young boy from drowning at a local fair. Her picture and Lisa's are splashed across the news and papers, threatening the world Lisa has so carefully constructed. As things begin to fall apart, each of the three women must begin to confront the many secrets they have been keeping.

I wasn't sure what to expect with this book. I seem to be one of the few people left on the planet who hasn't read Pinborough's Behind Her Eyes. However, all the hype about that one probably raised my expectations for this novel. I will admit, I found it to be oddly captivating. It's told from the points of view of Lisa, Ava, and Marilyn and oscillates between the present and the past. As a result the story unfurls slowly, releasing details in increments. It certainly adds to the tension and suspense of the book.

It's clear that all three women have their own secrets, but figuring out what they are is pretty fascinating. The book definitely kept me guessing until the end. Just when I thought I had something figured out, it threw me another curveball. I didn't particularly love Lisa or Ava--Ava more because I felt like I didn't get to know her that well, but I really liked Marilyn. Pinborough is very good at capturing the voices of her characters--each was unique and easy to picture.

In the end, I found the plot for this one to be interesting, and it kept me reading. Still, it's something that I can't really explain, except to say that nothing about this book "wowed" me. I liked it, but didn't love it. There's no real reason that I can put my finger on, just a feeling. Still, this is a very intriguing psychological thriller. It's twisty, with interesting characters. I still need to get to BEHIND HER EYES. 3.5 stars.

Thank you to William Morrow for my copy!

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We all could use a little mercy now: 13 MINUTES.

13 Minutes by Sarah Pinborough

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


When they pull Natasha out of the river, she's been dead for thirteen minutes. Thirteen dark, cold minutes. It's amazing the teenager even lives; in fact, it's just pure luck that a man and his dog stumble upon her and pull her from the river's icy clutches. Tasha, as she's known, has no memory of how she wound up in the river, but she knows it wasn't intentional on her part. In fact, she's pretty sure two of her closest friends, Hayley and Jenny, had something to do with it. The two seemed weird in the days leading up to the incident. The trio of beautiful, popular girls--known as "the Barbies" at school--were supposedly the best of friends. But after the accident, Tasha feels drawn to her former friend, Becca, whom she dropped in middle school. Becca isn't sure why Tasha is suddenly being so nice to her. Tasha isn't sure either. And no one is exactly sure how or why Tasha ended up in that river.

I've never read a novel by Sarah Pinborough before, and I was pretty impressed. She's a great writer, and she certainly knows how to capture the voice of the teenagers within the pages of her novel. I don't think I realized this book would be quite so YA, if that makes any sense. I kept waiting for there to be a bit more to the story than teenage politics, but it's truly sort of a Pretty Little Liars-type tale. That's not to say it's not well-done. It may have just been a tad bit young for me; still, it's an excellent novel and would be a truly wonderful read for most teens, too.

Part of the novel's brilliance comes in its format. It's told from the point of view of Becca and Tasha, but we also get excerpts from Tasha's diary; case files from the Inspector on Tasha's case; notes from Tasha's psychologist; texts between the teens; and more. I enjoyed the format, and it was quite effective at building suspense and tension.

Because, wow, yes, the book is certainly tense and compelling. You're constantly wondering how reliable our teenage narrators are and questioning everything that happens. Now, as mentioned, there's a lot of teenage drama. A LOT. These teens are truly a little scary, and this was yet another book that makes me a tiny bit frightened for my five-year-old daughters to grow up. My goodness. At times, I got a bit bogged down in all the teen antics, but it was still quite interesting.

Becca was definitely a bit of a kid, but I still liked her (for the most part). She was well-written, just a little young for me. Pinborough is truly amazing at getting in the head of these teenagers--capturing the pettiness, meanness, and honestly, sometimes the dumbness, of their mindset. But she also caught the brutal neediness behind some of their actions: that raw need of kids that age to fit in with their peers.

I had a decent idea how this one was going to play out pretty early on, but that didn't stop me from reading (as mentioned, I tore through this in about 24 hours). There's something oddly compelling about this book and its characters. Pinborough weaves in The Crucible as a backdrop--it's the school play--which is a really clever move, as there are a lot of parallels between said drama and the melodrama unfolding among Tasha, Hayley, and Jenny.

Overall, this novel really just hinges on the duality of the hatefulness and vulnerability of teenagers. It may come across as a little too YA and predictable for some adults, but I can't deny that it's well-written and crisp. It's hard to like some of the characters, but I think it would make a great book for teens (albeit it's rather freaking scary). I was leaning toward 3.5 stars before writing this review, but I think I'll do 3.75 and bump up to 4 stars here on Goodreads and the blog (that's not complicated at all, right? Perhaps fitting for this complicated and twisty novel).

I received a copy of this novel from Netgalley and the publisher (thank you!) in return for an unbiased review; it is available everywhere as of 10/03/2017.

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